Keeping Secrets Read online

  I loved my best friend to absolute bits, but I’d never understood her passion for all things sharing. I listened to her, though, because she was my best friend and it was my job to listen.

  She was a technician who owned the nail bar next to my small ice-cream shop, so listening to everything she learned while doing her job was an almost daily occurrence. My shop was slow right then, so I didn’t mind. It wasn’t like my actual job was keeping me busy, unfortunately.

  “I didn’t know that. I didn’t even know they were dating.”

  To be fair, I was also having a hard time placing who Katrina was and I was pretty sure I didn’t know any Ryans, so I probably wouldn’t have known they were dating. Why would I?

  Julia didn’t seem to realize I had no idea who she was talking about, though. She was too busy picking up steam with the rest of the story, passionately immersing herself in it.

  “Yup. Ryan’s girlfriend didn’t know about it either. Isn’t he just the worst for cheating on her like that? I mean, Ally’s one of the sweetest girls in town and he just moved in with another woman without even breaking up with her first. I can’t believe either he or Katrina would do that.”

  “Cheating on her would have made him the worst, no matter who she was,” I pointed out, but even I had to admit that Ally really didn’t deserve to be treated like that. At least I knew who she was, so I wasn’t a total lost cause after all. “Is she okay?”

  I didn’t know her well enough to call her a friend, which was also why I hadn’t known she had a boyfriend. But she came into my shop after getting her nails done with Julia sometimes and we’d chatted. She really was sweet.

  Although I had technically been born and bred here in Myrtle Beach, my mother had shipped me off to boarding school as early as possible. All my life, I’d attended fancy schools to prepare me for the life my parents wanted for me.

  I’d never lived up to their expectations, no matter what I did. Eventually, I’d realized that I never would and I stopped trying.

  At that point, I’d been about to embark on my third year of law school. Instead of re-enrolling, I’d come back here and used all my savings to buy my little ice-cream parlor. I didn’t need a degree to own my own business, and since I had realized I would never make my parents happy, I did something to make myself happy instead.

  Of course, that meant I’d only come back to town as an adult and I didn’t know nearly as many people as Julia did. We’d met as kids, but she’d never left and had a huge local network because of it.

  When I’d returned, she’d welcomed me back with open arms and we’d been friends again ever since. But I wouldn’t be able to get all those years I’d been lost to everyone here back.

  Julia shook out her fiery red head of wavy curls and pouted. “No, she’s not okay. I think we should dismember him with a blunt butter knife as punishment.”

  A chuckle escaped before I could stop it. Then I put my hand on her shoulder and rolled my eyes. “Whoa there, cowboy. You really have to stop saying stuff like that in public. Some people might think you’re being serious.”

  “I am being serious,” my fiercely loyal friend muttered. “He’s an ass.”

  “Yeah, but even asses are entitled to human rights. We’re absolutely not dismembering him,” I said firmly, even though I knew she wasn’t really being serious. Julia wouldn’t seriously hurt or maim a fly, never mind a Ryan.

  On the other hand, even if she wouldn’t dismember him, there was a small chance she’d kick him in the shin with her little foot the next time she saw him. She might be small, but she kicked like a mule thanks to martial arts training for most of high school.

  “If the next thing you were going to suggest was kicking him, I’m telling you right now that you can’t do that either.”

  She sighed deeply, clutching her heart as if I’d injured her. “That was what I was going to suggest. How about punching him in the balls?”

  “No. No acts of physical violence will be sanctioned.” I laughed, shaking my head at her.

  Before I could tell her no acts of mental warfare would be accepted either, the bell above my door jingled and signaled the arrival of a customer.

  I perked up, thinking that I might be about to make my first sale for the day when I saw who it was.

  My spirits dipped again because I knew there was no way Amber was going to buy an ice cream.

  She came in at least twice a week to sample some flavors but always left without making a purchase. Although I knew she wasn’t about to change that now, I still smiled when I greeted her.

  “Hey, Amber. How’s it going today?”

  She sniffed the sweet air in the shop, shuddering as if the air itself would make her gain weight. “Do you have any strawberry shortbread for me to try? It’s a strawberry shortbread kind of day.”

  “Really?” Julia planted her hands on her hips and lifted her brows at Amber. “Why don’t you buy some strawberry shortbread for a change then?”

  Amber scoffed. “I shouldn’t even be having a sample because of all the calories in it. There’s no way I can have a whole cone.”

  “Then why—” Julia started, but I bumped my hip into hers to shut her up.

  “It’s no problem. You’re in luck. I do have strawberry shortbread. Let me get you your sample.” Smiling brightly, I turned to grab one of my sample containers. I added a blob of strawberry shortbread to the thick cardboard base of it and walked back to the counter to hand it over.

  “Thank you,” she gushed, eating the generously sized sample in two bites and dumping the container in the trash. “See you girls around.”

  She hightailed it out of the shop with a wave of her fingers. Julia cocked her hip on the counter and faced me. “You have got to stop giving that girl free ice cream. She’s never going to buy anything, but she’s coming by almost every day now.”

  “It’s not that bad,” I said, but when I thought about it, I knew she was right. Amber was coming in a lot more than twice a week, which was how often I used to see her. I sighed before I explained why I couldn’t just stop serving her free samples. “She’s going through a tough time right now. Her cat is sick and her brother’s fiancée is rubbing it in her face that she’s getting married and Amber isn’t.”

  “You’re too good to her,” Julia said, rolling her chocolate-colored eyes. “Surely, they covered the need to make a profit in one of your fancy business classes. Even if they didn’t, I know there’s a smarty-pants deep down inside of you. I remember how you’ve never met a test you didn’t ace without even needing to study for more than an hour.”

  I shrugged. “Maybe having the knowledge doesn’t mean you have good business sense, but I’m getting by. I’d rather be true to myself while I do it. It’s not like I’m looking to build up an empire of ice-cream parlors.”

  Julia’s reply was cut off by another chime of the bell. My heart soared with hope again, only to slam itself back down to the very bottom of my ribcage when I saw Mr. Nicholson walking into the shop.

  Our landlord’s appearance was never a good sign. He owned the strip mall both our shops were in and he loved to dangle it above our heads that he could evict us at any time.

  Joseph Nicholson wasn’t much older than we were, but in his early thirties, he’d already started going gray. He dyed his hair a few shades too blond to try covering it up and slicked it back like he was in the nineteen fifties.

  His sharp gray gaze landed on us, a cruel smile that never quite reached his eyes inching his way up his thin lips. “I’m glad I found both of you. How are our businesses doing this month?”

  I bit back a sigh while Julia’s nostrils flared. We despised it when he acted like he owned our businesses just because he owned the mall they were located in.

  Joseph was a big deal in town. He’d moved here from New York after making a crap ton of money in investments. He’d apparently decided to spend that money buying up real estate all over our county and loved flashing it around.


  “It’s fine,” I managed to say without any of my hatred of the way he treated us seeping into my tone. “How are you?”

  He smirked. “Oh, I’m excellent. There’s nothing quite like a day checking in on all of my investments.”

  Julia’s mouth pulled into a very forced smile. It looked like it was so hard to do that, her lips might crack from the action. “We’re sure. What are you doing here, Mr. Nicholson?”

  No one was allowed to call him by his first name without his permission, which obviously he hadn’t given us. We were worse than mere peasants in his eyes. We were tenants.

  He flicked his hand into the air and waved it around. “The monthly rent for the mall is going up next month. I thought I should give you some notice.”

  Julia’s brow furrowed while my heart sank. I was barely breaking even as it was. Having to make higher rent could force me to close my doors.

  Or worse. Force me to approach my parents for help.

  The very thought of having to crawl back to them, especially to ask for money, made me sick to my stomach. They’d never approved of my business and I had no doubt that if I went to them for help, there would be some awfully fat strings attached to anything they did for me. If they did anything to help me at all.

  “Is there anything we can do to stop it from happening?” I blurted out the first question that came to mind. All I could think about was finding some way of making the business survive without having to involve my parents.

  Unfortunately, in my moment of weakness, I forgot about how lecherous Joseph could be.

  Almost immediately, the blood drained from my face as I noticed lust darkening his eyes. They raked over my body, making me feel like there were fire ants on my skin where his gaze lingered. He didn’t even try to hide that he was checking out my breasts, his fingers twitching like he was imagining touching them.

  A shiver traveled down my spine. Definitely not a good kind of shiver, but he must have mistaken it for interest.

  “There’s nothing you can do, unless you’re willing to renegotiate the terms of your contract over dinner.”

  Julia’s face said it all, her disgust so apparent that I worried she was about to throw up on her shoes. I felt the same way, but I couldn’t let him see it or else he’d take my rejection even harder and make it that much more difficult for me to stay on.

  “Thank you for your offer, but I’ll find some way to make the payments. It’s hardly fair that only my contract should be renegotiated.”

  He narrowed his eyes, the familiar cold cruelty replacing the lust there in an instant. “Very well, ladies. I’ll be coming to collect soon. Have a good day now.”

  Both of us held our breath until he was gone, then groaned when the door shut behind him.

  “Damn, he’s so gross,” Julia said, her lips twisting. “I can’t believe he’s raising our rent just to try to force you to go out with him.”

  “I don’t think it’s that. I think that was just him taking a chance. He’s raising our rent just because he can.” And I honestly didn’t know how or even if I would make it once he did.

  Chapter 3

  Callen

  “Do I have to go to day-care today, Daddy?” Winter’s lower lip trembled and her eyes were misty when I met them in the rearview mirror.

  It was our first Monday back home in Los Angeles, which meant back to school for Winter after spending the last couple of months on the road with me.

  “Yeah, sweetheart. You do.” I pulled into a spot outside the center and unbuckled my seatbelt, twisting around to face her. “What’s wrong? Why do you look so sad? Haven’t you missed your friends while we’ve been gone?”

  “I don’t like it here,” she said, her small sweet voice quivering. It broke my fucking heart to hear her sounding so upset. “I don’t like the other kids and I don’t like my teacher.”

  Every word out of her mouth was like a physical blow to my chest, but I couldn’t let her see it. She was in pain. She needed me to be the adult, to give her comfort and reassurance.

  Fuck. Alice would have been so much better at this than I am.

  I couldn’t afford to think about it too much right then, though. Not if I didn’t want Winter to see I was sad, too.

  “It will get better, baby. You’re probably just feeling this way because you’ve spent all day with me for so long now. You’ll get back into the swing of things soon.”

  She sighed, nodding as she looked down at her hands folded in her lap. The problem was that I knew it wasn’t just that. Winter wasn’t happy here. She never had been.

  My smart, sweet little girl wasn’t throwing a tantrum because she had to go back to school. She was genuinely unhappy.

  But I was fucked if I knew what to do about it.

  The plan had been that Alice would stay home with her the first few years. She’d been a freelance photographer for the band since we’d become a big enough deal that people would actually buy her pictures of us.

  Since it was a position she could always go back to or do part-time, she’d said she wanted to put all her focus on Winter for the first couple of years after her birth. They’d still have traveled with me whenever I had to go on tour and Winter would have both of us there for her.

  We had it all planned out. Life was supposed to have been fucking perfect.

  Then it was all blown to smithereens when she went to a doctor because she’d started having headaches that wouldn’t go away. At first, we’d thought the headaches, nausea, and fatigue were a result of the pregnancy, but it turned out it wasn’t that.

  After Winter was born, the symptoms didn’t go away.

  It turned out what was causing them wasn’t the pregnancy but a fucking brain tumor. She had advanced-stage brain cancer, the inoperable kind, and eight months later, she was gone.

  Eight fucking months. How the hell was I supposed to have prepared for any of this in eight months?

  I’d had my entire world ripped away from me and, at the same time, had a little girl to care for. A little girl who was my entire world, even though it still felt like everything that had made up my world was gone.

  My passion for music, the rush of performing, my fucking wife.

  Yet every time I looked at Winter, I knew I would survive because she was my heart and my world running around right in front of me.

  It was all so confusing that I still got headaches when I thought about it.

  What it came down to was this. I had no other option than day-care. My parents were long gone, I had no other family she could stay with, and neither did Alice.

  Therefore, while we were in town, Winter had to attend a day-care center so she wouldn’t be all alone with a nanny at home. Apparently, it was important for her to socialize at her age.

  Whenever I went on tour though, she came with me. Since I had no one to leave her with in LA and I wouldn’t have been able to leave her for such long periods of time anyway, there was nothing I could do about her being alone then.

  It wasn’t a perfect arrangement, but it was the best I could do. Fuck.

  “I’m sorry, sweetheart,” I said finally, hugging her tightly when I got her out of her car seat. “You have to go inside now, but I promise to see you later, okay?”

  She nodded into the crook of my neck, then grabbed her backpack once I set her down and marched into the center with her head held high. I was so damn proud of her, it felt like my chest might burst.

  But I was also going to have to come up with another plan. I wouldn’t be able to stand seeing Winter that sad every day. It would break what little of me was left in half.

  All the way to the recording studio, I played around with alternative ideas. My mind kept coming back to Alice, though. What she’d envisioned for our baby and the way life was supposed to have been.

  Alice had grown up in Myrtle Beach and we’d planned on buying a house there once the baby was born. She wanted to raise Winter in the same place she’d been raised as much as possible. We were going
to stay in LA whenever I had to record, go on tour when I had to, but then go home to Myrtle Beach in between.

  Stupid fucking cancer.

  I screwed my eyes shut and swallowed the lump in my throat as I parked in the VIP lot at the recording studio. The familiar burn of flames licking at my insides only subsided once I had my guitar in my hand, locked away in one of the booths reserved for us.

  A song came spilling out of me when my fingers slid across the strings. It didn’t take me much longer than a second to realize the lyrics popping up in my head were about Alice’s hometown. Myrtle Beach. Where Winter was supposed to have had a home too.

  “I called Craig,” Clark’s voice suddenly boomed through the equipment. “He’s meeting us here in a few minutes, so you’d better get your ass out of that booth. The song was sounding good, though. What was it? I don’t think I’ve heard it before.”

  I shrugged and stowed my guitar on the stand, not answering his question just yet. Craig came into the studio a minute after I joined Clark, a shiny black leather briefcase in his hand.

  “I spoke to a few people over at the label,” Clark said, jumping in without any pause or pleasantries. “They told me you made the decision about us touring with Axe. It’s not something they’re requiring us to do.”

  “So what?” Craig set the briefcase down and clicked it open, extracting a thick sheaf of papers. “I made a decision on behalf of the band I manage. Here are the contracts. All your usual riders have been included. Sign them and get them back to me.”

  “Or what?” Clark’s green eyes narrowed, the muscles in his shoulders rigid and tense. “You made a decision without talking to the band, after I told you we weren’t going to do it. The label is happy for us to take the time off we were promised and to negotiate new contracts for us for a next album since our current contracts are up.”

  “You don’t sign onto this tour with Axe, there won’t be anything for you to come back to whenever it is you wanted to come back.” Craig’s tone was as sharp as a goddamn samurai sword, but neither of us so much as flinched.